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Chandler,Mon,there’s only one banana-nut muffin left.
钱德，摩妮卡 香蕉核果松饼只剩一个
I ordered mine first.
我先点的
Yeah,but I’m so much faster.
对，但我比你迅速
Give it to me.
给我
No.
不
Give it to me!
给我
Okay,you can have it.
那给你吧
There you go. Enjoy your coffee.
请慢慢享用你的咖啡
That was there when I got here.
那一杯不是我的
Hey,you’ll never guess who’s coming to New York.
各位 你们绝对猜不到谁要来纽约
Quick,tell us before he swallows.
菲碧，在他吞下去以前说
Ryan,that guy I dated who’s in the Navy.
我在海军服役的男朋友莱恩
You went out with a guy in the Navy?
你有个当海军的男友？
I met him while playing guitar in the park.
对，我在华盛顿广场 演奏吉他的时候认识的
Ryan threw in saltwater taffy because 
he didn’t have change.
莱恩丢卤水太妃糖给我 因为他没有零钱
Is that when you wrote “Saltwater Taffy Man”?
你“卤水太妃男子” 就是那个时候写的？
No,he’s my submarine guy. He resurfaces every couple years…
不，他是我的潜水艇男人 他两年出水一次…
…and we have an amazing three days together.
…然后我们有最不可思议的 三天相处的时间
Only this time,he’s coming for 2 weeks. Two whole weeks,which means “yea”!
只是他这一次要来两个礼拜 整整两个礼拜
So this guy goes down for,like,two years at a time?
等等，你是说这个傢伙 每次一下水就是两年？
That’ll teach you to lick my muffin.
谁叫你舔我的松饼啊
Hi.
嗨
Oh,no. What happened?
怎么了？
I just spoke to Carol. Ben’s got chickenpox.
凯洛刚刚告诉我说 小班得了水痘
Oh,no.
不
Yeah,so if you haven’t had it, chances are you’ll get it.
所以如果你们还没有得过 那你们大概会得到
-I’ve had it. -I’ve had it.
我得过了 我也得过了
-Had it. -Had it.
得过 得过
I’ve never had it. I feel so left out. Oh,look!
我从来没得过 我觉得被遗忘了，看
六人行 第2季 第23集 
出水痘
Honey,you made the bed again.
亲爱的，你又铺床了
I told you,you don’t have to do that. This isn’t camp.
我说过，你不用铺床的 又不是夏令营
Then I guess the panty raid last night was totally uncalled for.
那我猜昨晚的内裤大袭击 完全没有道理了
I’m taking a shower. Today I’ll sing Jim Croce’s “Leroy Brown.”
我要去洗个澡了今天我要唱 柯吉姆的“李诺布朗”
Hey,Mon,I have a question.
摩妮卡，我有个问题
Is Leroy the baddest man in the whole damn town…
李诺他是 “全镇最坏的男人”…
…or the fattest man?
…还是“全镇最胖的男人”
The baddest. Otherwise,the song would be “Fat,Fat Leroy Brown.”
最坏，不然那首歌就会叫 “胖子李诺布朗”
What are you doing?
你在干什么？
I’m just waiting for you,sweetie.
只是在等你，甜心
Are you remaking the bed?
你在重新铺床吗？
I’m sorry. The way you did it, it was just fine.
对不起… 你铺的样子完全没有问题
Then you’re redoing it because…?
那你重新铺是因为…？
You’ll think I’m crazy.
说出来你会认为我疯了
You’re pretty much running that risk either way.
你说不说都会有这个危险
Okay. You see…
你看…
…the duvet tag shouldn’t be at the top left corner…
…被子的商标 不该在床的左上角
…it should be at the bottom right corner.
…应该在床的右下角才对
-That’s not so crazy. -I’m just easing you in.
那不会很疯狂 我只是在帮你暖身
All right.
好
You see these little flower blossoms?
你看到这些小花了吗？
They should be facing up not down…
那应该往上不是往下…
…because the head of the bed is where the sun would be.
…因为床头的位置 是太阳的方向
You don’t love me anymore,do you?
你不再爱我了，是不是？
Actually,if it’s possible, I love you more.
事实上，如果可能的话 我会更爱你了
Really?
真的？
Wow. Well,then,come on!
那来吧…
I wanna show you how to fold the toilet paper into a point.
我要教你 怎么把卫生纸折出尖角来
If you need something to hold you over…
如果你需要一个工作 应急的话…
…I can get you a job here as an entry-level processor.
…我可以给你一个 基层的资料处理员的工作
Don’t you need experience?
那种工作难道不需要经验吗？
It’s not hard to learn.
要学也不困难
As for people realizing you don’t know what you’re doing,you’re an actor.
如果你怕别人看出 你不晓得自己在干什么的话
Act like a processor, people will think you’re a processor.
那就扮演一个处理员啊 人们就会相信你是个处理员了
Here’s this morning’s projections.
钱德，这是今早的预算表
Thanks. Scott Alexander,Joey Tribbiani.
谢了，李史考 崔乔伊
Joey is a fellow processor.
乔伊他也是一个处理员
No kidding?
真的？
I process. People want the processing, I’m the one they call.
我处理 人要找人处理，他们会找我
-Where do you work? -Well,I’m in between things.
你在哪儿高就？我正在转业当中
You know,one day you’re processing, the next day…
你也知道的嘛 今天你还在处理，到了明天…
…you’re not so much processing anymore.
…你就没有那么多 可以处理的了
I told Joey about the opening in Fleischman’s group.
我正要告诉乔伊 梅乃兹的部门缺人
Fleischman’s group.
梅乃兹的部门
Whatever you do, don’t touch his sandwiches.
那你要记住别碰他的三明治啊
Are all you processors dorks?
处理员都是驴蛋，是不是？
This lipstick looks just great on you.
你擦上这口红真美
You look fabulous. You really do.
你美呆了，蜜糖
Yeah,are you sure? Really?
你们确定吗？真的吗？
See,you look beautiful. For God sakes,dim the lights.
瞧，美得不得了 老天在上，灯调暗
I’m hideous!
我好恐怖喔
It’s gonna be okay.
不会有问题的
Ryan’s been underwater.
莱恩一直在水下
He’s just gonna be glad you don’t have barnacles on your butt.
你屁股没有长牡蛎 他就该谢天谢地了
Come in.
请进
Hey,baby,I’m back
宝贝，我回来了…
Hey,Ryan. What’s up?
莱恩，你好吗？
What’s going on?
你怎么了？
No,no. You have to stay back.
不要… 不要再往前走了
I have the pox!
我长痘痘了
Chicken or small?
水痘还是天花痘？
Chicken,which is so ironic considering I’m a vegetarian.
水痘，很讽刺 因为我根本就不喜欢吃豆子
-Why aren’t you home in bed? -My grandmother’s never had chickenpox.
那为什么不在家里休息？因为我奶奶没得过水痘
Please tell me you have,because oh,my God,I forgot how cute you are.
拜托，告诉我你得过 老天，我忘了你多可爱了
I’m sorry,I never had them.
抱歉，我没得过
If I had one wish, I’d go back to when I was 7…
如果可以许一个愿的话 要回到我七岁…
…when Jimmy Hauser had chickenpox, and rub that kid all over my face.
…吉米得水痘的时候 我会抓住他的手在我脸上蹭
Yeah,or you could wish that I didn’t have them now.
对呀，或许你也可以希望 我现在没有得水痘
Can I see your face?
我可以看你的脸吗？
No. You don’t wanna see a face covered with pox.
不行 你不会想看一张痘子脸的
It could be lox,I wouldn’t care.
就算长满腌鲑鱼我也不会在乎
And you hate fish.
可是你恨鱼
So sweet. All right.
真甜，好吧
Okay,all right. You can see.
那你看嘛
This is me.
这就是我
Sorry!
很抱歉
I am scary!
我很吓人吗？
The lightening was an unfortunate coincidence.
不，是闪电 刚才的闪电真是很不巧合
You look lovely! Lovely!
你很漂亮，你真的很漂亮
I hate this.
好讨厌
I had the most amazing two weeks planned for us.
告诉你，我计划了 两个最不可思议的礼拜
And everything I had in mind, we had to be a lot closer than this.
而我所计划的一切 都得比现在更为亲密
I’ve spent the last eight months in a steel tube with men…
我跟一群男人 在钢管里关了八个月…
…thinking about this moment.
…我一直祈盼的就是这个时刻
I am not gonna let a bunch…
我不会让这里…
…of itchy spots stand between us.
…也痒，那里也痒 分开我们两个
Okay. This is the most romantic disease I’ve ever had.
我从来没有得过 这么罗曼蒂克的病
-How’s the first day? -Good. It’s like you said.
第一天上班怎么样？蛮好的，就像你说的
It’s putting numbers from one column into another.
大部分只是把数字 从一栏轮到另一栏而已
There you go.
我跟你说过了
And everybody’s nice. I just had a good talk with that lady Jeannie.
而且大家都好好，我刚刚才跟 那个红发女士聊天，叫金妮的
Jeannie? The head of East Coast operations,Jeannie?
金妮？东岸营业部的总裁金妮
Turns out our kids go to the same school.
原来我们的孩子上同一所学校
Yeah. Small world,huh?
世界真小
Weird world.
世界真怪
Your kids?
你的孩子？
I figure my character has kids.
我猜我的角色有孩子
There isn’t a part of that sentence I don’t need explained.
那句话我没有一个字听得懂的
When you’re acting,you need to think about that stuff.
你瞧，演戏的时候 你需要思考那类的事情
My character, Joseph the processing guy…
我的角色，资料处理员乔瑟…
… has two little girls, Ashley and Brittany.
…有两个女儿，喜莉跟布妮
Ashley copies everything Brittany does.
布妮做什么喜莉都要学
Well,invisible kids can be that way sometimes.
有时隐形小孩就是那个样子的
You know,Joseph and his wife,Karen, are thinking of having a third kid.
乔瑟跟他太太凯伦 正考虑再生一个
You know what?
知道吗？
Just did.
刚刚生了
That’s some pretty powerful imaginary sperm you must have there.
我想你那想像的精子 一定非常强
IKnow what makes the itching worse?
你知道什么比痒更难受吗？
That you don’t stop talking about it?
你要继续提痒这个字吗？
-Fine. -Let’s just play,okay?
好 只要专心的玩嘛
Good,okay.
好
Here we go,double sixes.
要丢了，十二
Here we go….
要丢了…
Here we go….
要丢了…
Come to Mama. Getting ready to roll the dice….
来妈妈这里，色子准备要…
What are you doing? Are you scratching?
你在干什么？你在抓痒？
No. This is what I do for luck,okay?
没有，我在祈求好运
You’re scratching.
你在抓痒，色子给我
Give me the dice.
把色子给我
-Give me the dice. -No! Here. There!
把色子给我 不要，好嘛…
Look,double sixes!
看，十二
We can’t scratch. We’ll scar.
我们不能抓，会留下疤
I can’t stop thinking about it. It’s just so hard.
可是我没有办法不去想 那个痒字，太难了啦
I wanna grab these houses and rub them all over my body.
我只想抓住这些房子 磨擦我的每一英寸肌肤
-No! -Give it!
不可以 给我
Come on!
来呀，给我
You know you want it. You know you want it too.
你知道你要的 你知道你也要，对不对？
Let’s just be bad. It’ll feel so good.
就坏一次吧，包你欲仙欲死
Come on.
来吧…
Oh,God,help me.
神帮助我
-Oh,yeah. -Okay,good. Now do me.
好棒 好，现在换我了
Do my back. Oh,come on. Harder!
来，抓我的背 来吧，快点，用力…
There you go.
我来了
-Don’t move. -Why?
别动 为什么？
-Don’t move. -What are you…?
不要动 干嘛…？
Stop that. Stop that right now.
住手，马上住手
I might’ve expected this of Phoebe. But,Ryan,you’re a military man.
我相信你会这样，菲比 但是莱恩，你是个军人呀
You and Milton have to join us on the boat. Bring the kids.
你跟米顿得来坐我们的船 带孩子们来
We’ll make a day of it.
咱们好好玩一天
That sounds lovely. We’ll have to set it up.
听起来好棒 我们得好好安排一下
I better get back. Hope the baby feels better.
我最好回去了 希望宝宝好点了
Thanks.
谢谢
-Bye-bye,Jeannie. -Bye-bye,Joseph.
谢了，拜拜，金妮 拜拜，乔瑟
What a phony.
好虚伪
You’ll teach her a lesson when she steps off the dock onto nothing.
我相信她在码头一脚 踩了个空的时候她就会学乖了
-Hey,Mr. Douglas. -Sir.
岛先生 日安
Bing,I got your memo. We’re not gonna see the report until next Friday?
听着，备忘录我收到了 系统报告下周五才会出来？
My group wants to spend the holiday with family.
我组里的人希望这个周末 能够跟家人一起共度
I have a family. I’m gonna be here.
我也有家庭 但我还是会来这儿
Yeah,Bing. What’s that about?
是啊，老宾，你干嘛呢？
It’s about cutting them a little slack for morale.
我要让我的人稍微喘一口气 以提高士气
Look,I can get some rough numbers by Wednesday.
如果你想看大概数字 我可以在星期三以前给你
Rough numbers?
大概数字？
This company wasn’t built on rough numbers. Right,Mr. Douglas?
公司不是建在大概数字上 我说得对吗，岛先生？
Have the final numbers on my desk by Tuesday.
星期二以前 把正确数字放在我桌上
If you say so,sir.
照你的意思做吧
Joseph’s good,isn’t he?
乔瑟很行，是不是？
I’m going to kill you.
乔伊，我要杀了你
Hey,I just figured Joseph’s the kind of guy who likes to mix it up.
乔瑟是那种喜欢争的人
You know,get in there, ruffle some feathers.
你知道，一头钻入，兴风作浪
Why?
为什么？
Look,I’m sorry, but that’s what Joseph does.
听着，抱歉，但乔瑟就是那样
Okay? If you try to pull something…
你想耍花招的话…
… he’ll call you on it.
…他会揭发你
“What are you trying to pull?” he’ll say.
他会说“你耍什么花招？”
Duct tape.
电线胶带
Was I supposed to bring something too?
我是不是也该带点什么来？
This is for the scratchy twins. I taped oven mitts to their hands.
这是给那对痒鸳鸯的 我把手套帖在他们手上
You’re strict.
你真严
Well,it’s for their own good.
这是为他们好啊
You know,I like the way you have efficiently folded this tab under.
摩妮卡，我很欣赏你有效率的 把胶带的一端折起来
See,in a tape emergency you could shave valuable seconds off your time.
你看，急需用胶带的时候 可省下好几秒宝贵的时间
Exactly!
正是
God,I love that I can be totally neurotic around you now.
真高兴在你面前 可以完全的神经过敏
Tell me the truth.
告诉我实话
Don’t you like having everything on your desk perpendicular?
现在你桌上的一切都是直角的 不是好多了吗？
If it’s not a right angle, it is a wrong angle.
如果它们不是直角 那就是错角
-Very good. -Thank you.
很好 谢谢
Tomorrow,I’m gonna do your clocks.
你知道吗？明天我要改你的时钟
You’re gonna do what to my clocks?
你要怎样改我的时钟？
Set them to my time.
我要把它调成我的时间
I’m confused.
这我搞糊涂了
I thought we shared time.
时间不是都一样的吗？
No. See,in my bedroom I set my clock six minutes fast.
不…瞧 我把房间的时钟调快了六分钟
Wanna know why?
想不想知道原因？
Because it’s in a slightly different time zone than the kitchen?
因为跟厨房在不同的时区里
Forget it.
算了，我不想要说了
No,come on,tell me.
来嘛，告诉我嘛
-You don’t understand. -Come on.
不，因为你不会明白 来嘛
You don’t have any obsessive things.
不，你根本没有 任何可爱的小怪癖
No,that’s not true.
那不对…
Oh,yeah? Tell me one of yours.
是吗？好吧，说一个来听听
One of my things is I always separate my sweat socks…
譬如说吧，我总是 把我的运动袜…
…from my dress socks.
…跟西装袜分开来摆
What if they get mixed up?
如果搞混了会怎样？
Boy,I would just….
天啊，那我会…
I would freak out.
我会发狂
You would not.
你才不会
I can’t believe this. I hate this. You’re too normal.
我真不敢相信 真讨厌你那么正常
I can’t believe you don’t have a “thing.”
真不敢相信我的男友没怪癖
My boyfriend doesn’t have a “thing.”
我的男友没有怪癖
See,if anyone overheard that, I didn’t come off well.
如果有人听到你这句话 别人会怀疑我无能
-Mr. Douglas is looking for you. -Why is Mr. Douglas looking for me?
岛先生正在找你 为什么要找我？
He suspects you dropped the ball on the Lender project.
因为他怀疑 你搞砸那个连纳方案
Why? Why does he suspect that?
他…为什么要怀疑我？
At first,he thought it was Joseph…
因为原先他以为是乔瑟…
…but after he asked Joseph about it, turns out it was you.
…但在问了乔瑟之后 发现结果是你
-Anyway,I thought you should know. -All right. That’s it.
反正我想你应该知道啦 好吧，够了
Look,Joey…
听我说，乔伊…
… I realize this is the role of a lifetime for you…
…对不起，我了解这是你 这辈子最重要的一个角色…
…and if I could just fire Joseph, I would. But that’s not possible.
…若我可以只开除乔瑟就好了 不幸的是，那是不可能的
So I have to let you both go.
所以我必须要开除你们两个
What? Everybody loves Joseph.
你在胡扯什么？大家都爱乔瑟
I don’t. I hate Joseph.
我不爱，我恨乔瑟
I think he’s a brown-nosing suck-up.
我认为他是个马屁精
You can’t fire Joseph. He’s not in your department.
是吗？你不能开除他 因为他不在你的部门
All right,okay. So I can’t fire Joseph…
好吧…我不能开除他…
… but I can sleep with his wife.
…但是我可以跟他老婆睡
Not Karen!
凯伦，不！
Yeah,I’m thinking about having an affair with her.
我正在考虑跟她搞婚外情
You know what?
你知道吗？
I just did.
刚搞了
What the hell are you doing?
你对我做了什么，老兄？
Oh,it’s not me.
不是我
It’s my character!
是我的角色
Chandie.
钱迪
The rogue processor who seduces his coworkers’ wives…
对，为了好玩 而引诱同事老婆的坏处理员…
…and then laughs about it.
…隔天在饮水机旁边当笑话讲
In fact,I have her panties right there in my drawer!
其实她的内裤就在我的抽屉里
-Really? -No,freak show,she’s fictional!
真的吗？假的，疯子，根本没有这个人
Take it easy.
放轻松一点
If it means that much to you, I’ll go find something else.
这对你那么重要的话 那我找别的事做好了
Thank you.
谢谢你
It’s just that I’m gonna miss Joseph.
只是我会想念乔瑟的
I liked him. His wife.
我喜欢他，和他太太
She was hot.
她好火辣
Please take these off. I swear I won’t scratch.
拜托你拆掉，我发誓我不抓了
No,sorry,hon. Monica’s orders.
对不起，摩妮卡的命令
Well,that wasn’t easy.
真不简单
Okay,dinner’s on.
晚餐好了
There’s a peach cobbler warming in the oven.
烤箱里还有一个桃子饼在保温
So the plate’s gonna be hot,but that shouldn’t be a problem for you.
盘子会很烫手 但那应该不成问题才对
All right,you kids. Bye,now.
好了，孩子们，拜拜
-Bye. -Oh,look,look.
拜拜 你们看
A low-budget puppet show.
低成本的木偶剧
A shame you can’t see what finger I’m holding up.
真可惜你看不到 我举起的是哪一根手指
-Wine? -Please.
酒？麻烦你
-Spilled some. -I got it.
泼出来了 我来
You look beautiful tonight.
我得告诉你，你今晚好美
What?
你说什么？
Sorry.
对不起
You look beautiful.
你好美
You know what? That’s it. That’s it.
够了，我受够了
Oh,yes.
真好
Good.
好
You guys,did you?
你们…
Monica…
摩妮卡…
…wake up.
…醒醒
What’s up?
什么事？
I thought of a thing.
我想到一个了
Yeah?
是吗？
I have to sleep,have to, on this side of the bed.
对，我必须睡…我必须… 睡床的这一边
No. You have to sleep on this side of the bed…
你必须睡床的这一边…
… because I have to sleep on this side of the bed.
…是因为我必须睡床的这一边
Or so I would have you believe.
还是因为我让你那么相信
So you have a side of the bed. Everybody has a side of the bed.
没什么大不了啊 这毛病大家都有
Hey,come on. You haven’t heard my reason yet.
别这样嘛 你还没听我的理由呢
All right,go on.
好啊，说吧
I have to sleep on the west side…
我必须睡在床的西边…
… because I grew up in California…
…因为我是在加州长大的…
…and otherwise…
…睡东边的话…
…the ocean would be on the wrong side.
…海洋的方向就错了
Oh,my God.
天啊
You’re a freak!
你真变态
How about that?
你觉得怎么样？
Where’re you shipping off to?
莱恩，你这次要潜到哪里？
I really can’t say.
我真的不能说
Do you have nuclear weapons onboard?
那你们潜水艇上有核武吗？
I can’t say.
我不能说
Do you get to look through a periscope thingy?
那你是不是可以用 潜水望眼镜那种东西看东西？
I’m sorry,but I can’t say.
对不起，我不能说
Wow,it’s neat learning about submarines.
学潜水艇的知识真酷
-I better not miss my flight. -I’ll walk you out.
该走了不然会错过飞机 我送你出去
-Bye,Ryan. -Pleasure. Take care.
拜拜，莱恩 幸会了
So do you think we could get you one of those uniform 
things?
你想我们可以 弄套制服给你穿吗？
You like that,do you?
你喜欢，是不是？
Oh,yeah.
是呀
I’ll make some calls.
我去打电话
Can you believe that’s how we spent our two weeks?
你相信我们两个礼拜 是这样共度的吗？
We didn’t do the romantic things I’d planned…
我知道，我计划的浪漫事 我们没一件事做过…
…Iike having a picnic in Central Park and coffee at Central Perk.
…像去中央公园野餐 还有来中央公园喝咖啡
Oh,I just got that!
我们刚喝过了
Taxi!
计程车
Bye,you.
再见
I’m sorry,we’re
对不起，我们打烊…
Hey,sailor.
水手
Is this what you had in mind?
这是你心里想的吗？
I’ll say.
可不是
I’m shipping out tomorrow.
我明天就要出海了
Well,then…
那么…
…we better make this night count.
…春宵别虚度了
Wait,I forgot to turn off the cappuccino machine.
等等，我忘了关咖啡机了
Anchors aweigh.
起锚吧
Oh,wait,wait! My purse,my purse!
等等… 我的皮包
I forgot to turn off the bathroom light.
我忘了关洗手间的灯
Why don’t I just meet you 
upstairs?
我们干脆楼上见好了
Honey!
蜜糖
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